Wednesday, 17 August 2011

Benaras Journal 11th Aug, 2011

Never has this place seen so much of water on its streets for the last 30 years. So much of attempts, yet an uncertainty. A ‘drowned city’ and a drowned ‘Assi’.
They say Assi is the name of the sword which some ‘Devi’ used to slay a demon and then threw it on the shores of the Ganges. They say its Assi because it’s the 80th and the last ghat on the ghat lines of Benaras.
I finally found my new adobe near Assi as I wanted and now it’s rediscovering the breeze everyday and understanding and somehow reliving the stories of Kashi. Mystical talks, chaos…
So many attempts, yet failed. Failed to find the truth; the truth of the universe. Is anything wrong with the words? Nay, the bosom of Desdemona as Gogoi says is the most filled with lust, denied of expectations, eventually; denied of rights. None caresses here, none bothers.
An adobe in its most purest form. It is difficult to understand the concept of achieving ‘moksh’ within the circle of Kashi; Kashi and not Benaras. So, “I” stay in Kashi!
Why should anybody believe? What is the punch line? You die here and get rid of the cycle of life. Do you care? Will your soul know that you are rid of the cycle of life? And that it is going to live a splendid eternal span in the heavens?
I see desperation everywhere. Humans desperately trying to seek a reason to spend their time frame on specificity. Desdemona’s lust has many directions, for I understand that her meditation does not bear any fruit, I understand that she has accepted the truth of the universe more than any other living souls.
They also say, “Benaras ki subhah aur Lucknow ki sham”. One shouldn’t miss it! Woke up 5 o’clock in the morning to stall the gullies. Fresh shits, dungs everywhere and bundles of plastics flying over my head right in the middle of the road. Beautiful…
I forced my boat over thy river, when I couldn’t understand you from the lines of any ghat. Tried my sort of attempt from Assi till ‘Mayawati Park’, another beautiful lady, yet it didn’t bear any fruit.
Desdemona shall always remain a mystery and all the questions and challenges will only succumb to the silence of thy river.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. A truthful downpour from an intriguing mind. Your writing is gaining great depth. Your internal revelations are so visible in this piece.The very questions that bother us on a lonely evening seeing the sun set by the sea... And questions perhaps for which there are no answers.
    Some of the lines here may mean different things for different readers, but that perhaps is the beauty of it. Feel the vibe...

  3. After this comment, I should think I am better than Khushwant Singh. Thank you so much man

  4. ehy, good one, but be careful about some of the things. never use "some'Devi", in a way it's an insult. if it starts with capital "d",then it has definitely some divinity attached to the word. would like to hear more about the mayavati park and more.heheh! well, about the circle of life and death, talk to people, as many as you can. from the scholars to the chandals, if you really trying to seek to a direction, it helps. go for a journey within...